My past does not define me, and yet the story I tell myself about my past does.
And if that story isn’t serving me — if it creates a version of me that isn’t who I want to be — then I can retell it.
I can reinterpret the facts.
Why not relabel my experience to support the best version of me that I can be?
Stop chaining yourself to that one time. That one time you interpreted the facts to mean something they didn’t need to. That one time your experience compelled you to make a promise to yourself that you don’t actually want.
Because quitting high school soccer does NOT mean you’re a serial quitter that can never stick anything out and that you can’t decide on one thing and are afraid of commitment and so will be alone forever. And even though this is partially an exaggeration, doesn’t it sound familiar? Most of us have something LIKE that.
Revisit the experiences that have shaped you.
Notice how your experience impacts the story you tell yourself today about yourself.
Maybe relabel that experience & write your own story.
[If you want to cling to resentment or promises (“I’ll never trust another boy!”), you can do that. Notice who that is serving. Because resentment and anger don’t affect the other person, they only affect you. Notice if that is what you really want to choose.]